I’ve had lots of requests to keep publishing archived newsletters, so heeeeeeeeeere’s November! Enjoy!
That Winning Feeling!
Helloooooo from sunny Florida! (I think!),
I say “I think” because I’ve spent the last seven weeks packing and unpacking boxes and suitcases. It all started in September when my husband, Rhett, and I began sorting and packing stuff from our home of thirty years to move to a new house in Berlin, Vermont. If you can’t imagine how much stuff accumulates in thirty years, let me give you an idea. We rented a dumpster and filled it with 2000 pounds worth of junk! (partially because I finally got Rhett to throw away his forty year old shirts that he wore in high school) Our conversations went something like this:
Me: Please throw out those forty year old shirts.
Rhett: But they still fit.
Me: But you don’t wear them.
He actually did very well, but I did catch him rescuing some old t-shirts.
Me: Why are you taking those t-shirts out of the dumpster? You’re supposed to be throwing stuff away.
Rhett: They make really good rags.
Sigh…I guess you can never have too many really good rags.
Anyhow, on October 8, we started moving into the new house. That gave me less than two weeks to partially unpack, and then repack for Florida. We drove to Florida over three days and arrived on October 23. I had three days to “unpack” before repacking to leave for the Virginia Equine Extravaganza. I’m now home again surrounded by boxes and repacking to leave for a Speakers’ Boot Camp in California on November 8. Phew!
So what’s the point of this long story? The point is when things get overwhelming, the best way to give yourself an attitude adjustment is to ask high quality questions.
When you ask low quality questions, your brain searches for an answer and can only come up with low quality answers. Here are some low quality questions: “Why do we have so much junk?” “Why do we have so little time to get this done?” “How come the movers are so expensive?”
Those kinds of questions just leave you frustrated and stressed out. (Generally, those questions start with the words “Why? “ or “How come?”) So, I asked a better question which was “What’s good about this?”
That question allowed me to come up with answers like the following:
1. I get to sort through some useless junk and do a really thorough cleaning.
2. I found a lot of treasures (photos, earrings etc.) that I had forgotten about or “lost”.
3. I was forced to organize my office, and now I can actually find what I need.
Get the picture?
So, when you have a lousy ride, a disappointing show, or a lame horse, get yourself out of your funk by ASKING A BETTER QUESTION such as, “What’s good about this?”, “What can I learn from this?”, or How can I use this?” Your answers will surely empower you.
Live Your Dreams!
One newsletter reader asked the following question.
Hello, I hope you can help. I learned the half halt by studying your videos. However, I am still unsure of how to put weight onto individual seat bones. Do you have you any tips? Michael
Sit in a chair. Keep your shoulders and hips square while you alternately put more weight on your right seatbone and then your left one. You’ll feel each seatbone press down (heavier, deeper) into the chair. Once you can alternately press each seatbone down into the cushion of the chair, try the same feeling on your horse.
THE LAW OF ATTRACTION
The following is some reader feedback on the Law of Attraction (LOA). For more info on LOA, go to my web site http://www.janesavoie.com
Thank you for sending a copy of your newsletter. I have to tell you when I first started reading about the “Law of Attraction”, I was floored. I have suspected and even joked to others about things in my life I have acquired saying they simply have been created by my mind. This was the only explanation I have for them because conventional methods would dictate these things simply would never have happened. Yet they have. I will continue to study the law of attraction. DW
Elite athletes in every sport use visualization as a peak performance tool. When making your mental movie, remember the following five things:
1. Relax (Take 3 deep breaths)
2. Fill in details (What does your horse look like? What are you wearing?)
3. Use your five senses. (Feel the contact on the reins. Smell the fly spray. Hear the rhythm of the footfalls. See your horse’s head and neck out in front of you. Taste the salt dripping down from under your protective headgear!)
4. Use emotion as you go through your movie (Experience the emotion you want such as being brave, confident, calm, relaxed etc.)
5. Repeat daily. (It takes 21 days to develop a habit.)
Here are some reader excerpts from people who are using visualization to help them with their challenges:
I am an adult beginner who started riding about five years ago. I found your lecture describing how to visualize effectively very informative. I plan to use the techniques extensively to conquer a few fears and improve my overall skills. I particularly enjoyed the “detailed image” discussion. Unfortunately, my detailed image of a canter depart has my body leaving the saddle, doing a perfect 180 degree flip in the air, and landing on the ground on my back. I have this image down perfectly! I am now changing that to eliminate the “rider-in-the air” gymnastics. Already the canter departs are getting better. MS
Just dropping you a note to tell you how I recently used the visualization techniques you describe in your books. (I’ve actually used visualization for my riding for years, and it has helped a great deal.) This past week, though, I was in a “tight spot”. I had to go to the hospital for an MRI. For the MRI, they place you in a tube and take shots of your brain. The tech asked if I was claustrophobic. I am also a scuba diver and had never had any problems with claustrophobia so I said no. I was placed in the tube and was fine for the first two or three minutes. Then I started to panic. I thought I’d better ride a dressage test. At each six minute section, the tech would say, “Six more minutes.” I rode the first test at super sonic speed. As I came out of the tube forty five minutes later, I thought I needed a few more seconds to finish my salute! This was one of the worst and best moments of my life. The MRI was the worst, but I rode the best dressage test of my life! KD
Congratulations to Anne Hazlett who did her mental training homework and finished RESERVE CHAMPION out of 116 horses in the Novice Amateur Hunter Under Saddle at the Quarter Horse Congress! Anne was second only to last year’s world champion amateur hunter under saddle. 116 horses! Pretty awesome night to say the least!
As riders, core strength is essential to controlling our positions and, therefore, being able to give aids that are effective. I learned the best core toner from my trainer Linda Freeman who works out of First in Fitness in Berlin, Vermont. It ‘s called the Plank Position. And the best part is, it doesn’t take much time to do!
Here’s how to do the Plank Position. Lie on your stomach. Raise your front end up by bending your elbows, clasping your hands together, and supporting yourself on your forearms so your shoulders come off the floor. Place your feet about a foot apart, and then flex your ankles so you’re up on toes. Your whole body except for your forearms and toes are off the floor. Be sure to keep your back flat. Don’t let your butt drop or stick up in air. Your body is almost parallel to the ground.
Hold that position for as long as you can. In the beginning that might be only 15-30 seconds or so (See…I told you it wouldn’t take much time!) As you get stronger, you’ll be able to hold the “plank” for longer periods.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
There are three sides to every story. Your side, my side, and the truth.
EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE
Enjoying the Challenge
Soccer season has once again come to an end. Sigh…
This was my third year coaching my son’s team – and probably the most exciting. Lots of great plays, close calls, and blossoming talents and skills.
On Saturday, we played our last game. It was a real nail biter, with both teams seeming very evenly matched. I heard some players on the other team talking about how they’d never lost a game.
After the game, the other coach told me this was the most exciting game they’d played all season.
That was really exciting news for my boys. Sure, we lost 3 to 1, but we were missing some of our players, so that everyone had to play the entire game without a break, while the players on the other team had rest periods.
And, the two boys who were missing were two of our best players.
That day, each of my boys got a chance to really show what they were made of, and held their own against a talented team. I was really proud of them.
Very different from the last game of last season, which our team won 10 to 1.
Now, that was fun, too. Don’t get me wrong – I like a winning. But I can’t say that it was quite as exciting.
See – it’s the challenge that we came for.
If you play chess, do you like to play against people who are new to the game, such that you win in a few moves without losing a piece…?
If you watch sports, do you really want to watch your team shut out the opponents every game…?
Where’s the fun in that?
And, where’s the growth…?
There’s an old saying, “Smooth seas never made skilled mariner.”
It’s the challenges that push us to grow.
To be more than what we were.
To be more of who we really are…
Magnificent Children of God.
Sure, if we’d had all our players on Saturday, we would likely have won. But there was some greatness that was pulled out of the players by the increased challenge they faced.
And they felt great about themselves afterwards. And isn’t that what they are there for in the first place?
Well, perhaps that is what we are here for, in this big game of life.
I am not saying I’m opposed to some easy wins – and much of the tapping is about allowing the wins to be easier.
But I wouldn’t want to tap away all challenge. That would be boring.
So, the next time the going gets tough, don’t just get going…
Grateful for the opportunity to find out how magnificent you are. And know that you are indeed magnificent, and are big enough for the challenge.
Even if you don’t succeed in every challenge…
And you won’t… (If you are, you probably aren’t playing big enough…you don’t want to be like a 19 year old playing against 4 year olds…)
…You can walk away knowing that you are better than you were before.
That you are moving closer to the magnificent potential that is within you.
And allow yourself to really enjoy that.
My boys felt great on Saturday. They were proud of themselves. They knew they’d played their best, and they’d had a blast. That was what mattered.
Surely you have at least the wisdom of a seven year old…
I hope you enjoy this month’s newsletter. If you know someone whom you think would also enjoy it, please forward it on-thanks!
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